Giddy Up

On the way back from new Mexico I was dog sick and barfin' my brains out on the plane ride back to LA. We got in the car and I was wedged in between both the kids strapped into their car seats. Barfing into a barf bag from the plane while I was shaking and crying I heard a little voice say, "Mommy?" I looked at Noah and said, "yes?" She asked, "Is any of that getting on me?"

The Honey Bee Himself

Noah has never asked to go to bed, NEVER. But Isaiah is a different little seed. If it's after 8:30, he'll start pointing to his bed and saying, "crib" or "bed." He sleeps so well... well up until 5:30 and then he says "mommy" in a slow whine about 300 times until we get him up. We try to be firm and let him stay in the crib (unless he starts screaming) until 6 or 6:30 - and I often shut the door and put the pillow over my head (the heaviest pillow) but it doesn't work. I still hear him and feel a deep itching guilt in my stomach even though.. even though I know it's what we're supposed to do. So needless to say I rarely sleep past 6am and when I do wake up at 6am by force of habit and he isn't yet awake I keep peering in to make sure he's breathing or there or whatever other crazy thoughts I have as a worried mommy. How do you shake that worry? I'd love to not worry so much... if it turns out I'm crazy (which could be possible) then it would be crazy with worry over my kids. I don't worry about money or the value of our home (which sucks) I worry about these lunatics that i love with every cell of my body. I worry about their well being, their safetly, and their sense of self.

Gratitude

"If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is 'Thank You,' that would suffice." - Eckhart

Today I am thankful for:

1. Having done yoga, the doing is the hard part - the having done is the best part.
2. Seeing Noah in her ballet tutu and slippers.
3. Isaiah's long afternoon naps
4. Our beautiful backyard, our beautiful, beautiful backyard
5. The left over chocolate cupcake that I'm fixin' to eat right this minute!